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Key & Peele’s East/West Bowl names come from three separate releases, not one lineup: the original 2012 sketch, East/West Bowl 2 (2013), and East/West Bowl 3: Pro Edition (2015). The roster reference lists 95 names in all—32, 32, and 31 respectively. The 2020 Every East/West Bowl Ever video is a compilation, not a fourth roster.
Original East/West College Bowl (2012)
The roster reference lists 16 names for each side. It does not give college affiliations for this edition.
East
- D’Marcus Williums
- T.J. Juckson
- T’varisuness King
- Tyroil Smoochie-Wallace
- D’Squarius Green, Jr.
- Ibrahim Moizoos
- Jackmerius Tacktheritrix
- D’Isiah T. Billings-Clyde
- D’Jasper Probincrux III
- Leoz Maxwell Jilliumz
- Javaris Jamar Javarison-Lamar
- Davoin Shower-Handel
- Hingle McCringleberry
- L’Carpetron Dookmarriot
- J’Dinkalage Morgoone
- Xmus Jaxon Flaxon-Waxon
West
- Saggitariutt Jefferspin
- D’Glester Hardunkichud
- Swirvithan L’Goodling-Splatt
- Quatro Quatro
- Ozamataz Buckshank
- Beezer Twelve Washingbeard
- Shakiraquan T.G.I.F. Carter
- X-Wing @Aliciousness
- Sequester Grundelplith M.D.
- Scoish Velociraptor Maloish
- T.J. A.J. R.J. Backslashinfourth V
- Eeeee Eeeeeeeee
- Donkey Teeth
- Torque (Construction Noise) Lewith
- The Player Formerly Known as Mousecop
- Dan Smith
East/West Bowl 2 (2013)
The roster reference gives a school or label for each name where stated; some affiliations are intentionally comic rather than conventional institution names.
East
| Player | School or label |
|---|---|
| Coznesster Smiff | Rutgers University |
| Elipses Corter | University of Alabama |
| Nyquillus Dillwad | LSU |
| Bismo Funyuns | Florida State University |
| Decatholac Mango | Georgia Tech University |
| Mergatroid Skittle | University of Louisville |
| Quiznatodd Bidness | University of Tennessee |
| D’Pez Poopsie | Ole Miss |
| Quackadilly Blip | Auburn University |
| Goolius Boozler | University of Miami, “the U” |
| Bisquiteen Trisket | University of Michigan |
| Fartrell Cluggins | University of Arkansas |
| Blyrone Blashinton | Syracuse University |
| Cartoons Plural | Virginia Tech |
| Jammie Jammie-Jammie | Ohio State University |
| Fudge | No school given |
West
| Player | School or label |
|---|---|
| Equine Ducklings | Indiana University–Purdue University Indianapolis |
| Dahistorius Lamystorius | Utah State University |
| Ewokoniad Sigourneth Juniorstein | Oklahoma State University |
| Eqqsquizitine Buble-Schwinslow | University of Nebraska |
| Huka’lakanaka Hakanakaheekalucka’hukahakafaka | University of Hawaii |
| King Prince Chambermaid | Baylor University |
| Ladennifer Jadaniston | University of Colorado |
| Ladadadaladadadadadadadadadadadadadadada Dala-Dadaladaladalada | University of Arizona |
| Harvard University | DeVry University |
| Morse Code | Army, Navy Surplus Store |
| Wingdings | Online classes |
| Firstname Lastname | College University |
| God | Homeschooled |
| Squeeeeeeeeeeps | Santa Monica College |
| Benedict Cumberbatch | Oxford University |
| A.A. Ron Balakay | Morehouse College |
East/West Bowl 3: Pro Edition (2015)
This edition is presented in a professional-player format. The college column below reproduces the roster reference’s affiliations; they are not independently verified here.
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East
| Player | College per roster reference |
|---|---|
| Creme De La Creme | Vanderbilt University |
| Cosgrove Shumway | Clemson |
| Ha Ha Clinton-Dix | University of Alabama |
| Doink Ahanahue | Marshall |
| Legume Duprix | West Virginia University |
| Leger Douzable | University of Central Florida |
| Quisperny G’Dunzoid Sr. | Central Connecticut State University |
| Grunky Peep | Georgia Southern University |
| D’Brickashaw Ferguson | University of Virginia |
| Strunk Flugget | University of South Carolina |
| Stumptavian Roboclick | Grambling State |
| Cornelius “Tank” Carradine | Florida State University |
| Vagonius Thicket-Suede | Duke |
| Marmadune Shazbot | Tulane University |
| Swordless Mimetown | Jacksonville State University |
West
| Player | College per roster reference |
|---|---|
| Prince Amukamara | University of Nebraska |
| J.R. Junior Juniors Jr. | Texas Christian University |
| Faux Doadles | University of Oregon |
| Fozzy Whittaker | University of Texas |
| Myriad Profiteroles | Utah |
| Busters Brownce | Illinois State |
| Turdine Cupcake | School affiliation is not intelligibly stated |
| Rerutweeds Myth | University of Washington |
| Ishmaa’ily Kitchen | Kent State University |
| Takittothu’ Limit | College of the Canyons, Santa Clarita, California |
| Snarf Mintz-Plasse | East Los Angeles College |
| Frostee Rucker | University of Southern California |
| Splendiferous Finch | Northwestern University |
| Triple Parakeet-Shoes | Ball State |
| Logjammer D’Baggagecling | North Texas University |
| A.A. Ron Rodgers | Cal |
Why the names mix invented players and real football references
In a 2015 NFL.com interview, Keegan-Michael Key said the sketch was inspired by New York Jets player D’Brickashaw Ferguson: “The East/West Bowl sketch was inspired by a Jet — D’Brickashaw Ferguson.” The third edition also includes real player names such as Ha Ha Clinton-Dix and D’Brickashaw Ferguson among its comic inventions. Jordan Peele discussed Clinton-Dix’s nickname in the same interview: “Hard to take it away from him because his first name is Ha’Sean. He is pushing for it. But if your mom calls you Ha Ha then even if it isn’t your real name then it’s Ha Ha.” The quotation reflects Peele’s interview wording, not a separate name record.
Independent reader supportYour contribution helps us test, update, and keep practical guides available for everyone.Spelling notes for exact quotes
The roster reference follows published name lists and uses an episode-script transcription for some apparent errors. It records “D’Pez Poopsie” in the published list but “D’pez Poopsie” in a script transcription; “Juniorstein” versus “JuniorStein”; and “Eqqsquizitine” versus a reported “Eqqsnuizitine” transcription error. It gives “Army, Navy Surplus Store” as the script spelling, despite a “Navay” typo on a list page. A.A. Ron Balakay (2013) and A.A. Ron Rodgers (2015) are different names in different editions. Comedy Central’s verified YouTube channel published East/West College Bowl 2 on September 13, 2013, describing it as introducing flamboyant players of the East/West Collegiate Bowl. For a name whose exact form matters, check the relevant video or episode rather than relying on a roster transcription.
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Anker USB C Hub, 5-in-1 USBC to HDMI Splitter with 4K Display
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- Dual Converters, Infinite Potential：Includes 2× USB C male to USB A female adapters and 2× USB A male to USB C female adapters. Perfect for a wide range of uses—tablets with Bluetooth keyboards, expand USB ports on macbook, and more. Two different converters for all your daily needs
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- Sleek 7-in-1 USB-C Hub: Features an HDMI port, two USB-A 3.0 ports, and a USB-C data port, each providing 5Gbps transfer speeds. It also includes a USB-C PD input port for charging up to 100W and dual SD and TF card slots, all in a compact design.
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- 5-in-1 USB-C Hub: Experience comprehensive connectivity featuring a Power Delivery input, two USB-A 2.0 ports, a USB-A 3.0 port, and an HDMI port. (Note: The USB-C power delivery input port is only for connecting an external wall charger to power your laptop and cannot power peripheral devices.)
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- What You Get: Anker USB-C Hub (5-in-1, 4K HDMI), welcome guide, 18-month warranty, and our friendly customer service.
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