What are the lamest superpowers on the Superpower Wiki? In a 2016 io9 list, writer Katharine Trendacosta answers with 25 abilities she finds useless, oddly specific, gross, or simply hard to explain. It is a comic opinion list, not an objective ranking: the article gives no scoring system, and some powers it pokes fun at have practical uses.
Trendacosta describes the Superpower Wiki as a useful reference for remembering ability names and finding characters associated with a power. Her list turns that catalog into a tour of superpowers whose limits are often the joke.
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The 25 lamest superpowers, in the article’s original order
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Sliding
Sliding over surfaces for unusually long distances sounds like a way to travel without much control over where you end up.
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Annoyance Inducement
This power makes other people annoyed. Its effect may be real, but the list treats it as a remarkably small-scale talent.
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Cheese Manipulation
The ability to create, shape, and manipulate cheese raises an immediate question: does it cover every cheese, or only certain kinds? The article also points to its close relationship to milk manipulation.
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Balloon Mimicry
Turning into a balloon is an unusual form of transformation, with the image doing much of the comedic work.
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Stench Generation
Generating a bad smell is gross, but Trendacosta concedes that it could be useful in the right situation.
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Anosmia Inducement
Rather than creating a smell, this ability prevents other people from smelling anything.
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Monarchy Inducement
The article quotes the Wiki’s description of invoking governmental authority and social order over a large area, then questions what that actually means and how the power would work.
Rank #2
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Disease Mimicry
Becoming something made up of disease is an unsettling premise. The entry, as discussed in the article, does not clarify whether the resulting form is contagious.
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Matter Ingestion
Eating any matter brings to mind Matter-Eater Lad, the DC character cited in the article. The ability’s breadth is striking, even if its usefulness depends on what the eater can safely do with it.
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Nail Manipulation
Growing long, stronger nails might offer a weapon, but the article finds the power overly specific when claws already suggest a broader ability.
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Sneeze Inducement
Making someone sneeze could disrupt them briefly. The list frames it as a distraction rather than a decisive advantage.
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Drink Mimicry
This transformation power lets its user take the form of a drink—a concept whose usefulness is left largely to the imagination.
Rank #3
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Enhanced Thievery
Being exceptionally good at stealing sounds more like a skill than a superpower, which is the article’s central objection.
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Garbage Mimicry
Looking like garbage may help someone blend into an unpleasant setting, but the list presents the premise as an especially unglamorous disguise.
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Supernatural Fruit Empowerment
Eating a supernatural fruit to gain powers is a familiar kind of origin story, but the article treats it as a peculiar entry in a catalog of abilities.
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Anxiety Inducement
Inducing anxiety could disable an opponent if the effect is severe. The article’s joke is that a mild case may not be much of a weapon.
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Goo Generation
Emitting goo or ooze is unpleasant, though making someone slip gives the power a possible tactical use.
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Induce Tickling
Making someone feel ticklish is another power whose comic premise is easier to picture than its strategic value.
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Appendage Generation
Growing extra arms could help with multiple tasks at once. The list’s placement among the lamest powers is part of its playful, subjective judgment.
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Offspring Detection
Sensing or tracking one’s children may sound niche, but the article acknowledges that it has practical value for finding them.
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Rainbow Generation
Creating a rainbow could be visually impressive, even if the list sees little combat utility in it.
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Optimism Inducement
Making people believe things will turn out well could help someone resist fear, or encourage an opponent to make strategically bad choices. The article notes both possibilities.
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Worm Regeneration
The Wiki summary quoted by the article is: “The power to regenerate wounds by absorbing maggots/worms.” The gruesome method is the point.
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Door Manipulation
This ability creates, shapes, and manipulates doors and gates. The article distinguishes that from summoning portals, while noting the possibility of door-based constructs.
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Death Inducement
Causing death is powerful, but Trendacosta frames it as killing rather than a distinct ability—an ending, not an especially interesting power concept.
What makes the list’s powers “lame”?
The list’s joke works in several different ways rather than applying one consistent test. Some entries seem too narrow, like growing stronger nails or tracking one’s children. Others sound like skills rather than powers, as with enhanced thievery. Several are defined in a way that invites questions, while others are memorable chiefly for being gross or visually odd.
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1Fix the driver behind crashes, sound loss and screen glitches2Repair Windows errors before they cause bigger problems3Scan for outdated or missing drivers - takes under a minutePractical usefulness is not the only measure in the article. Stench Generation, Anxiety Inducement, and Offspring Detection all receive a nod for possible utility. The humor comes from the gap between a power’s grand-sounding label and its limited, awkward, or unclear application.
How to read the ranking
Trendacosta published the list on September 29, 2016. Its numbered order is the author’s comedic sequence, not a scored comparison or a claim that fans agree on which powers are worst. The list is best read as an entertaining set of examples of how strange a superpower catalog can get.
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