Warren Buffett and Susan Thompson Buffett remained married for decades after they began living apart in 1977. Accounts of Warren’s relationship with Katharine Graham and Susan’s reported encouragement of his friendship with Astrid Menks have led to the description “open marriage,” but the cited reporting does not establish that the couple used that label for their arrangement.
What the “open marriage” description gets right—and what it doesn’t
The phrase captures an unconventional situation: Warren and Susan lived separately while maintaining a marriage and continuing contact, and reporting later described other relationships in Warren’s life. But it can imply a clearly defined arrangement chosen and named by the couple. The cited accounts do not show that they publicly called it an open marriage.
The most detailed narrative comes from Alice Schroeder’s authorized biography, The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life. The Washington Post described the biography as drawing on Buffett’s cooperation, interviews and access. Its reporting about the book is a source for the intimate details below, not independent confirmation of every episode.
How their relationship changed over time
1952: They married
Warren Buffett and Susan Thompson married in 1952, according to Susan’s 2004 Washington Post obituary.
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1977: Susan moved to San Francisco
In 1977, Susan moved to San Francisco and pursued singing. The Washington Post obituary and later accounts also describe her interests in friends and family. Her move should not be reduced to a single motive: the reporting places it in the context of her own pursuits as well as changes in the marriage.
They lived apart but remained in contact
The couple did not divorce. The Washington Post’s 2004 obituary said they had lived apart since 1977, remained friendly and often traveled together. An Associated Press account republished by The Economic Times also described them as staying in touch and spending time together while apart.
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In 2008, TIME reported that they had lived apart for 27 years, continued talking extensively by phone, and that Warren regarded the separation as his biggest mistake. TIME’s account summarized Schroeder’s biography, so the duration and characterization should be understood as reported through that source.
2004: Susan died
Susan died in 2004. Her obituary reported that Warren was with her at the hospital. They had remained married until her death.
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What the biography reports about Katharine Graham
The Washington Post’s 2008 account of Schroeder’s biography says Warren had a long-running affair with Katharine Graham, the publisher of The Washington Post. It also says Susan sent Graham a letter giving the two permission to continue their relationship. That letter is a detail attributed to the biography through the newspaper’s report; the cited account does not present it as a direct public statement by Susan.
The distinction matters: the affair and reported letter help explain why later descriptions use “open marriage,” but they do not establish a couple-chosen label or a complete account of the terms of their relationship.
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Where Astrid Menks fits in the story
Schroeder’s biography, as summarized by TIME and The Washington Post, says Susan encouraged her friend Astrid Menks to check in on Warren. Astrid eventually moved in with him. After Susan died, Warren and Astrid married.
These accounts describe an unusual relationship among the three, but they should not be collapsed into the simpler claim that Susan and Warren had a formally defined open-marriage agreement. The sources provide a biographical narrative, not a public contract or a label affirmed by both spouses.
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What to read if you want the fuller account
The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life by Alice Schroeder is the biography behind much of the detailed reporting. Contemporary coverage by TIME and The Washington Post summarizes parts of its account, while Susan’s obituary supplies context about the couple’s marriage, separation and continuing connection. Buffett’s advice to Schroeder, quoted in a Washington Post review, was to use the less flattering version when his account differed from someone else’s. That comment helps explain the biography’s reporting approach; it does not independently verify every personal detail.
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