If someone you care about may be thinking about suicide, take the concern seriously: ask directly, listen without judgment, and connect them with help. In the United States, call or text 988 for crisis support; call 911 for a life-threatening emergency. If immediate danger is present, stay with the person if you can do so safely and contact emergency or crisis services.
First, decide whether this is an emergency
If the person is in immediate, life-threatening danger, call your local emergency number. In the United States, the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) advises calling 911 in a life-threatening situation. Do not leave the person alone if you can remain with them safely; contact emergency or crisis support and explain what is happening. If you cannot be physically with them, stay in contact while arranging help from someone who can reach them, if that is safe and practical.
For crisis support and guidance in the United States, call or text 988, or use the 988 Lifeline chat. A family member or friend can contact 988 about someone else. A counselor can listen and help think through next steps. The Lifeline’s terms say a counselor may request a rapid in-person 911 or mobile crisis response when there is an immediate or urgent physical safety threat; 988 is not a substitute for professional health care. Check the current terms for service details, which may change.
If you are outside the United States, 988 and 911 may not apply. Contact your local emergency number, crisis line, health worker, or other local support service. If you are uncertain which route fits, describe the situation to a local crisis service or emergency operator and ask what to do next.
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Notice changes without trying to diagnose
Warning signs are reasons to check in and seek support, not a diagnosis or a reliable prediction of what someone will do. The 988 Lifeline says a change that is new, has increased, or appears after a painful event, loss, or major change deserves attention. Look at the person’s circumstances and changes over time rather than treating one sign as proof.
Possible warning signs listed by the Lifeline include:
- Talking about wanting to die or looking for a way to die.
- Expressing hopelessness, feeling trapped, or feeling like a burden.
- Using more alcohol or drugs than usual.
- Agitation, reckless behavior, rage, or extreme mood swings.
- Sleeping much more or much less.
- Withdrawing from other people or activities.
These examples are not a checklist for deciding whether someone is “really” at risk. A person may need help even if their behavior does not match a list, and a sign on its own cannot tell you what they will do. The 988 Lifeline warning-signs page describes the changes to look for.
Ask plainly and calmly
When you are worried, ask directly: “Are you thinking about suicide?” NIMH recommends asking this question and says that asking does not increase suicidal behavior or thoughts. You do not need to find perfect words. Choose a quiet time and place where you can give the person your attention, as the World Health Organization (WHO) advises.
After asking, leave space for an honest answer. Keep your voice calm, avoid turning the conversation into an interrogation, and let the person explain what they are feeling. If they say yes, thank them for telling you and focus on what support is needed now. You do not have to assess or diagnose them yourself; your role is to take the disclosure seriously and help connect them with appropriate support.
If they say no but you remain concerned, you can explain what you have noticed and ask how they are doing. A denial does not require you to argue or accuse them of hiding something. Keep the door open to talking and consider contacting 988 in the United States, a qualified mental health professional, or another local support service for guidance. NIMH’s five action steps include asking directly, being there, helping keep the person safe, helping them connect, and following up.
Listen without judgment, and do not promise secrecy
Give the person room to speak without debating, lecturing, expressing shock, or rushing to correct their feelings. Listening does not mean you agree with everything they say; it means you are trying to understand and keep the conversation open. Avoid minimizing their distress or making them defend why they feel the way they do.
Do not promise to keep the conversation secret. If the person describes a plan or you believe there is an urgent safety concern, involve crisis professionals or trusted support rather than carrying the information alone. You can be honest and caring at the same time: tell them you want to respect their trust, but you cannot keep a danger secret because you want to help keep them safe. The Lifeline’s guidance for helping someone else covers supportive conversation, secrecy, and seeking professional crisis help.
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Offer a specific next step instead of leaving the person to navigate options alone. In the United States, that may mean calling or texting 988 together, opening the Lifeline chat, contacting a mental health professional, or reaching a trusted family member or friend. Outside the United States, help them find the relevant local crisis or health service. Ask what kind of support feels possible, then offer to stay while they make the contact or accompany them to an appointment if they want that.
For ongoing treatment, help arrange contact with a qualified local mental health professional or service. Crisis support can provide immediate listening and next-step guidance, but it does not replace ongoing professional care. The right route depends on urgency: emergency services for immediate, life-threatening danger; a crisis line for crisis support and guidance; and qualified local care for continuing treatment.
WHO recommends offering to accompany someone to an appointment and checking in regularly. Practical help can be small and concrete: sit with them while they call, help them identify whom to contact, or agree on when you will check in again. Avoid making help conditional on the person explaining everything to you first.
Make the environment safer and plan for a crisis
When it can be done safely, help make highly lethal means less accessible. This is not a responsibility a family should have to manage alone, particularly when danger is immediate. Ask crisis professionals or a clinician for guidance about appropriate safety steps, and contact emergency support if the situation requires urgent intervention.
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A safety plan is a written set of steps the person can use when a crisis is developing. The 988 Lifeline describes a plan that includes:
- Warning signs that a crisis may be building.
- Coping actions the person can try.
- Supportive people they can contact.
- Professional and crisis contacts.
Encourage the person to make the plan with you, where appropriate, and with a clinician when possible. Keep it practical and easy to use when they are distressed; it should identify people and services they can actually reach. A safety plan is a support tool, not a substitute for emergency care when immediate danger is present. The Lifeline explains safety plan elements, and NIMH discusses safety planning and the family’s role in its suicide FAQs.
Independent reader supportYour contribution helps us test, update, and keep practical guides available for everyone.What to expect when contacting 988 in the United States
The 988 Lifeline offers call, text, and chat routes. Its service information describes support as free and confidential. For calls, a counselor asks whether the person is safe, listens, offers support, and may share useful resources. The Lifeline describes its conversations as judgment-free. A family member can contact the service for guidance about someone else; the person at risk does not have to be the one to initiate every request for help.
Confidentiality is not a promise that no further response can occur in an urgent safety situation. Under the Lifeline’s terms, a counselor may request an in-person response if they assess an immediate or urgent physical safety threat. Read the Lifeline’s current pages for the latest information about what to expect and how to contact 988. If the danger is life-threatening, use emergency services rather than treating a crisis-line conversation as a replacement.
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Stay involved after the immediate crisis
Support should not necessarily end once the conversation is over or the person has connected with care. NIMH says follow-up after a crisis or discharge from care can make a difference. Agree on a manageable way to check in, and follow through. If the person has a clinician or support team, encourage them to stay connected with that care and ask what follow-up would be useful.
Regular check-ins need not be elaborate. A brief conversation, a message, or an offer to accompany the person to an appointment can keep support accessible. If their situation worsens or you become concerned about immediate safety, reassess urgency and contact crisis or emergency support. Follow-up is not a guarantee of safety, and it does not make you solely responsible for the person’s care.
Care for yourself while supporting them
Supporting someone in crisis can be frightening and exhausting. Involve other trusted people and professionals rather than trying to be the only source of help. You can care about the person while recognizing that you cannot provide clinical treatment or control every outcome. If you are unsure what to do, contact a crisis service for guidance about the situation and the next safe step.
When asking another person to help, share only what is needed to get support and keep safety central. If the person has described a plan or immediate danger, do not let a promise of secrecy prevent you from involving crisis professionals or trusted support. If you are in danger yourself, move to safety and contact emergency services.
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| Situation | Where to turn |
|---|---|
| Immediate, life-threatening danger in the United States | Call 911. Stay with the person if you can do so safely, and seek emergency help. |
| Crisis support or guidance in the United States | Call or text 988, or use 988 Lifeline chat. A family member can contact 988 about someone else. |
| Immediate danger outside the United States | Contact the local emergency number or other local emergency service. |
| Ongoing care, in any location | Connect with a qualified local mental health professional or service; a crisis line can help identify next steps. |
These routes serve different needs: emergency response is for immediate life-threatening danger, crisis support offers help and guidance during a crisis, and professional care supports ongoing treatment. The United States numbers above are location-specific; elsewhere, use local services. For general prevention guidance, see WHO’s information on suicide.
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