“Big-Penis Disorder” is Chapter 17 of actor Lukas Gage’s memoir I Wrote This for Attention, not a separate book. In an excerpt and interview with InStyle, Gage presents it as a story about losing himself in a relationship he did not want to continue because he feared being alone—not simply as a sensational account of an ex. The intimate and medical details are his memoir account; they are not independently verified by the interviews discussed here.
What is “Big-Penis Disorder”?
It is the title of Chapter 17 in I Wrote This for Attention. The phrase is a joke on “borderline personality disorder,” introduced in a therapy scene in the excerpt published alongside Gage’s InStyle interview. GQ’s October 2025 interview also identifies the chapter and reproduces a short passage from that scene.
What does Gage say the chapter is about?
Gage told InStyle that he wanted to write about how much he could lose himself in a relationship he did not want to continue because he was afraid of being alone. He connected that fear, in his own account, to childhood abandonment and to his diagnosis of borderline personality disorder. He described his purpose this way: “With this relationship, I wanted to shed light on a story that wasn’t about losing the love of my life. It was about how much I could lose myself in a relationship.”
He also said, “I wanted to show how abandonment is linked so deeply with borderline personality disorder.” That is Gage’s interpretation of his own experience, not a general clinical claim about the disorder.
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What happens in the excerpt?
Gage recounts a relationship with an unnamed former partner and describes seeking medical care for symptoms he says were diagnosed as gonorrhea and chlamydia. In his narrative, he also searches online for possible explanations, asking: “Anyone experiencing a penis bacterial infection from swimming in the Malibu beaches today? This week? Ever?” That question is part of his account of searching; it does not establish that swimming or ocean exposure caused his symptoms.
The excerpt later moves to a therapy conversation about borderline personality disorder. These events and health details are presented as Gage’s recollection. The InStyle and GQ pieces identify the chapter and discuss his account, but do not independently corroborate the relationship, STI, or diagnosis details.
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Where can you read the excerpt and interview?
InStyle’s October 8, 2025 interview by Jonathan Borge includes the longer excerpt and Gage’s explanation of why he wrote the chapter. Read the InStyle excerpt and interview.
In a separate interview published October 21, 2025, GQ’s Cara Schacter identifies “Big-Penis Disorder” as Chapter 17 and includes a short passage from the therapy scene. Gage also discusses his own therapy experiences and coping strategies there; those reflections are personal, not treatment guidance. He says, “We can get addicted to self-loathing and be masochistic about our emotions.” Read GQ’s interview with Lukas Gage.
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How does the excerpt relate to the full memoir?
The published excerpt offers a portion of I Wrote This for Attention; it is not the complete chapter or a stand-alone work. The memoir is the relevant source for readers who want to read Gage’s account in its full-book context. Current editions and availability are not established here.
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